Deathly Hallows

So 2 of my favorite people and I have named ourselves the Deathly Hallows.  I, being the loudest, am the elder wand.  That's right, I'm a destructive force that in the right hands can kill the greatest dark wizard to date.  AWESOME!
This all came about at breakfast yesterday.  We three were discussing the state of our world, and where the responsibility for fixing it lies.  The interesting thing is that we all have different starting points in this conversation.  I'm a recovering Southern Baptist, one is a lifelong Catholic, and one is agnostic (although I think she was Methodist growing up).  Strangely enough, we didn't really disagree on anything.  Each of us saw the massive problems of poverty, disease, war, and government corruption.  And all of us agreed on whose job it is to address those problems: us.  Of course we worded it differently, but we all agreed that we should being doing everything we can as individuals and groups to solve these problems.  We even all agreed that whatever created this world, whether it be a god, multiple gods, or a speck of dust, would be very very very very very angry at how we've treated this creation.
It seems that the conversation on Christians specific role in this is becoming more and more prevelant.  Even Steven Colbert addressed it recently.  (Which was done very well, look it up.)
We have to take to heart that the Kingdom of God is here and now.  We need to start treating the sweet by and by what it is: The future that we create and influence NOW.  I don't want to go into this too much today, as I'm preaching on it December 26.  Consider this an advertisement for that. 
Just know that if we really mean it when we pray "Your kingdom come, Your will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven", that it will require work on the part of the kingdom's servants.

My Favorite Baptist

Andy Crockett is my favorite Baptist.  I should actually say  bassptist.  If you don't know what that means, shame on you.  I'm pretty sure they settled that term at the last convention.
Now that you know he's my favorite Baptist, let me tell you why.  Anytime I'm in a service with him that feels more Baptist than DOC, he gets me in trouble.  He laughs.  He giggles.  He mocks the people playing Bible Trivia on their iPads during the sermon.  He will argue with me about whether the wafer is the correct consistency to be the body of Christ.  I just enjoy being in worship with him.  I'm pretty sure this has been going on since middle school.  The only difference is his snarky comments have gotten wittier and more full of theology.
The really crazy part, is I've never felt like it was ever irreverent.  He genuinely loves God, and worships in truth.  I think Andy just gets that God rejoices in our joy, and laughs along with us when we are acting silly.  So, Andy is joyful and silly.
And gets me in trouble with all the other youth ministers.

Thoughts on a Recent Youth Meeting

Last night, we studied the Christmas Story.  As normal with youth, the subject changed.  Last night though, it changed for the better.  While discussing why Jesus came, an interesting question was brought up. Did Jesus come to make us behave ourselves, or did He come to know us, and help us know Him?  Now, 2 quick facts before moving forward: 1) We didn't, as a group, find a satisfactory answer; 2) This may be oversimplifying.

Now, let's break this down.  Why did Jesus come?  According to the KNERD Herd discussion last night, we have 2 basic options.

1. Jesus came so we could be forgiven, and learn how to stop sinning.  I don't know that this is a bad answer.  He did come to die, so we could be reconciled to the Father.  He did talk ALOT about how to treat our neighbor.  It just doesn't seem enough for me.  Being the sweaty heathen I am, this makes the deathbed confessional plan (live it up, sin as much as possible, seek God just before death) sound great.  If the only thing that is important is that I teleport to Heaven when I die, I'll talk to Jesus later.
2. Jesus came so that we could have a relationship with the Father now.  This complicates our plans.  There is no greater thing to strive for than to know the Creator, the Father, Jehovah Jirreh, Emmanuel, Adonai, the one true God.  That relationship would far outweigh any fleeting joy I have in other pursuits.  Now, I don't think this option replaces the first.  The youth disagreed somewhat.  I think this option is the blessed realization of the great love of God.  He didn't want to wait until Heaven.  The question becomes then, what was the focus of Christ's coming? 

Now, it is probably obvious which I think is more true.  I think number 2 is the better understanding.  That creates a new question though, what about our sinning?  Is the focus of Christ's coming is on relationships and reconciliation, does that mean we aren't focused dealing with sin?
I personally think that is exactly what means.  My best understanding of being in relationship with God and Jesus is that sin will be taken care of through the work of the Spirit, not my efforts anyway.  So, if I focus on loving God, and loving who He loves, the rest will work out.
Now, before I move on, let me clarify that I don't mean we never deal with sin.  Sin is destructive to us, everyone around us, and the world in which we live.  It is a huge problem that creates problems for those God loves.  I just don't think it is the #1 on the list of what we are supposed to be living about.  Again, I think if we focus our energy as individuals and as the group (church) on loving God and those He loves, sin will, most of time, lose it's place in our lives.
The problem with that understanding is that sin is easier to deal with, easier to take a stand on, and much easier to get really excited and passionate about.  It is a whole lot harder to take a stand on letting homeless people into your home.  It is really hard to be excited about going to a war torn country with people who don't like how you look to help with poverty.  There are very few political agendas addressing genocide in places we couldn't find on the map if our lives depended on it.  So in the goal of relationship with God and man, we must find our passion and identity in things that are not concrete.  That is hard, and I'm not even sure I know how to do that, especially in a group setting.

What are your thoughts? 

My Pastor Has Failed Me

That was Sunday night.  And he just did it again.  I've prayed about this, I've been broken about it and I have stared incredulously.  I'm just completely at a loss for words and direction.  Maybe I should elaborate.  He served decaf coffee at Bible Study, and just now told Penny she had "too much caffeine."



I know.  I'm in shock too.  I cannot not even imagine why you would drink decaffeinated coffee.  Just drink water.  Or real coffee.  And one can never have too much caffeine.  That is just a ridiculous statement.  And it's possibly unBiblical.  I'm looking that up.
In the middle of this insanity, I started thinking about how many of us a settling for what I'm calling "decaf Christianity."  Many others that are much smarter than me have called it "Almost Christianity."  There are actually 2 very well known sermons by that title, look them up.
I should probably expand on this a little.  There are simply too many people who do not expect to hear from God on a daily, if not more often basis.  The idea of having a personal, vibrant relationship with Jesus in the same manner as with our dearest friends is foreign to so many.  We try to adhere to some list of rules we've created from some ancient book, and can't figure out why we are not satisfied.  Now, all of that is fairly straightforward, what is not is the why.  I think there are a few reasons:
1) We don't know any different.  This is a scary one.  We've been copying each other for so long, we don't realise we have lost the original.  Even worse, we think that everyone else is happy.  Since we aren't satisfied, we just figure the problem is with us or assume this is as good as it gets.
2)We know different, we just don't do different.  Another scary one.  We realise we aren't getting it right, we are aware that we don't have a relationship with Jesus.  We just don't do anything about it.  We are either too scare or too lazy to act.
3)We don't realise there is more.  Maybe we think this is enough.  Why be unsatisfied if there is no more to be had?  That desire in our deepest souls is just part of the human condition, it doesn't get better until we get to heaven.

In the same way decaf makes no sense, Christianity without the relationship makes no sense.  It's just another list of things we have to be responsible for.  And none of us have time or energy for that.  So let's quit drinking decaf, literally and spiritually. 

Another reason I can't be a member of a mega-church:
Can you imagine me in a place with enough caffeine to fuel that many people?  I would get there early, have enough coffee to power a small country, and twitch like crazy for the next week.  Then, I would have to rush back to get my next fix.  It would not be a pretty sight my friends!

I Am Willing

One of my dearest friends is hurting today.  And I want to fix it.  But I can't.  This is a situation I've been in before, and I've never learned to like it or to be at peace with it.  I think most of you can relate.  We always want to take away the pain of those we love and cherish.  I think it is part of how we are made as relational creatures.  We're meant to be in relationship with each other.  But we are broken creatures living in a broken creation, so things get broken.  And while it is our first instinct to "fix it," we are broken too.  We can't even fix ourselves, how are we going to fix anyone else?
This has been bothering me all day.  How else can I deal with my friend's heartache if I can't just wipe it away?  I suddenly thought of one of my favorite Gospel passages, Mark 1:40-42.  In it, a man with leprosy comes to Jesus, and asks the Lord, if Jesus is willing, to heal him.  I love Jesus' response: "I am willing."
Now, I know this isn't a passage on heartache, loss or emotional suffering.  It is Jesus meeting the physical need of a person.  But those 3 words carry so much more weight than simple healing (if healing leprosy was simple!).  Jesus didn't just do it because he should, or could, or had to.  Jesus was willing.
This offers us 2 separate hopes today.  First, Jesus is willing.  We can know him, we can be clean, we can be reconciled to the Father because Jesus is willing to make that happen in our lives.  Secondly, we have a model.  We can't do what Jesus does, but we can be willing.  We can be willing to carry His good news, His joy, His truth, His comfort.  We can be willing to love people in the mess of a broken life.  We may not be able to fix anyone the way Jesus can, but we can be willing to love.  Our willingness to love shows a broken and hurting world that the Savior is willing.

Are we waiting or waiting?

Let's talk about waiting, specifically waiting on the Lord, as in everyone's favorite verse.

But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind. Isaiah 40:31 (The Message)

Now, I had for a very long time understood this verse to mean that when things get hard, just sit back and wait, and God will give me strength.  I don't know that this is a bad understanding, but I don't think it's the best.
We need to really stop and look at the word "wait".  I hear that word and my mind immediately goes to "Waiting for Godot."  The whole play is about 2 men waiting for a 3rd, named Godot.  The script revolves around them sitting, and waiting.  They do not go on to anything else, they do not try anything else.  They have put all hope in help from Godot, so they do nothing but sit and wait for Godot.  Now, many of us a Christ-followers do this, and I think it can be a good thing.  Jesus is the vine (we've talked about this) and our life and help come from Him.  Sometimes we need to wait in this context.
But there is another definition of waiting.  The roots of the word "wait" are the same roots as the words "waiting," "waitor," and "waitress."  Now, a waiter does anything but wait in our first context.  A waiter is constantly going, always on his feet, continually serving the master.  What if we use this context in Isaiah? 

But those who continually serve God and work to meet His desires get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind.

That now means something completely different.  Instead of sitting and doing nothing until God gives us the strength to continue, we now press into Him.  We work at His side, we strive to meet His every desire and serve Him for as long as He would have us.  And, in that serving or waiting if you will, He renews our strength.  We will soar like the eagles as we wait upon Him.  It makes me want to work and serve.  How about you?

Essa

You read that title right.  According to one sweet toddler, my name is Essa.  Now, if you are an adult, I will correct you for messing up my name in the following ways: Chestna, Chesnut, Chestnut, Chezna, Cheznut.  But I will never correct Lora.  She is the first person that young to even attempt my name, much less say the same thing every time!  And every time she walks in and says "Essa!", I just feel happier. 
I was thinking today (after correcting an adult about my name) about why this is.  I think I may have figured it.  When she comes in and says my name, she isn't looking for anything (most of the time).  She just sees me, and aknowledges that she knows me.  How great is that?
I have even better news than that.  God knows my name.  He knows yours too.  He knows the best and worst of us.  God knows everything we've done, haven't done, should have done, and shouldn't have done.  You can take that last sentence and put it in the future tense as well.  But more than the sum of our actions and choices, God knows our names.  He knows the truest form of me, because He created me.  He knows my name, and loves me.  He doesn't love because of me or in spite of me, He just knows me and loves me.
God knows my name.  And God knows your name.

Thoughts On Musical Terrorism

My BFF Evita, better known as Twin, and I have a game.  It is called musical terrorism.  The goal is to get the most annoying song stuck in the other person's head.  There is an art form to this.  The first and most obvious challenge is to not get the same song stuck in your head.  Second, you have to choose your technique.  I am the master of mass attacks: run in the room, sing a line or two, and run out.  Twin on the other hand is the queen of the subtle conversational tactic.  You'll be talking and trying to remember someone's name.  She'll say "She was a small town girl, right? She was living in a lonely world?  Did she ride trains?"  And bam.  You've been musical terrorized. 
I started a new battle Sunday.  I had heard "Eye of the Tiger" five different times Sunday, and I wanted to share.  It's been non-stop attacks since.  We are actually paranoid to check texts or answer the phone.  At the same time, I have the perfect song if I can just beat her to it.  She's currently ahead, only because she figured out how to use technology against me.
This had me thinking this morning.  What if we did the same thing with the Word of God?  So often we go to each other needing advice, comfort, someone to celebrate with, or someone to mourn with.  Instead of going to scripture, that we know to be powerful, we offer up cliches and worldly advice.  2 Timothy 3:16 says "All scripture is God-breathed, and useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness."  I love the word "useful" in that verse.  Scripture is useful for us.
Now the challenge here is that we must know the Word of God to speak it.  This takes time and effort in reading and memorizing.  It may be hard, but it is useful.
So, I'm going first.  To my friends who are either in their second weekend of a show, or those who open a show this weekend: Psalm 62:1-2 "My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him.  He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken."

And Twin, if you are reading this, I love you.  Please don't break my heart, my achy breaky heart!

Vines and Branches and Why I Kill Every Plant I Own

I really have killed every plant I've ever owned.  You know that bambo you can buy in the Mall of Abilene?  Yeah, killed that before.  Killed it multiple times (multiple plants, not the same plant over and over.  That would be impressive though).  I even took Plant Biology in college, and took the lab twice (I'm not a science person).  I understand why they die.  I just can't seem to do anything to keep them alive.  I could never be a farmer's wife, we'd starve.
Strangely enough though, I'm really wrapped in Jesus' description of the vine and branches.  Let's look at just a section of this great passage out of John 15:

5 "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. 7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. 8 This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples. 9 "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. 10 If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love.

I really love this passage.  That may seem confusing considering how I relate to plants.  But reread that.  I'm not the vine.  I'm not the one who produces fruit, I'm not the one that nourishes the plant, all I, the branch, have to do is stay connected to the vine.  I have to stay in relationship with the one that provides me life.  Now, I understand that staying in a vibrant, obedient relationship with Jesus is not always easy.  Sometimes it may even be the hardest option available.  But, when it comes down to it, it is far easier than trying to be the vine myself.  I kill plants.  If I were the vine, we'd all be in trouble.  But I'm not the vine.  Jesus is.  The one who was God, but became man; the one who conquered death; the one who provides us with life is the vine.  More than that, Jesus tells us that when we remain in Him, we won't just be alive.  We'll bear much fruit.  We'll grow.  We'll change.  We'll be abundant, and live abundantly.  It's not the easiest, but it is the best.
So, remain in His love.

Stand By Me | Playing For Change | Song Around the World

This video was posted on another blog I follow, and I loved it!
The video is made by Playing for Change.  They record musicians, have other musicians listen to the song and add their voice and instrument.  It isn't a series, it is a mix and a well done mix at that!
I'm sure there is some great truth or lesson or sermon here, but I don't really care.  Enjoy the music, friends!

Shout out to those who have helped me

The past few weeks I've spent quite a bit of time thinking about covenant relationships, to steal a phrase from Penny (that happens a lot).  I've also spent quite a bit of time thinking about discipleship and mentoring.  I don't necessarily want to go into those right now, although we are talking about covenant relationships at youth Bible Study tonight if you are interested.  What I've realized is that I am only who I am today because of the people that were obedient to making disciples.  There is a long list of people who poured themselves into me, teaching me, encouraging me, rebuking me, and loving me.  They made a commitment that went beyond friendship, and for that, I am forever grateful.
I've gone back forth all morning on whether to try to type out a list.  I've decided not to, because I'm sure there are too many that I'd forget, or not realize how much they changed me.  But be assured, I thank my God every time I think of each of you, and pray that I can do just a small part of what you have for the Kingdom.
Thank you.

Thoughts on Galatians 6

I like days like today.  There has been lots of good discussion in the office, much of it challenging, all of it loving.
I was struggling on what to blog today, when I read through Galatians 6.

Doing Good to All

1 Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. 2 Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 3 If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. 4 Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, 5 for each one should carry his own load. 6 Anyone who receives instruction in the word must share all good things with his instructor. 7 Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. 8 The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. 9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.

Not Circumcision but a New Creation

11 See what large letters I use as I write to you with my own hand! 12 Those who want to make a good impression outwardly are trying to compel you to be circumcised. The only reason they do this is to avoid being persecuted for the cross of Christ. 13 Not even those who are circumcised obey the law, yet they want you to be circumcised that they may boast about your flesh. 14 May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, through which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world. 15 Neither circumcision nor uncircumcision means anything; what counts is a new creation. 16 Peace and mercy to all who follow this rule, even to the Israel of God. 17 Finally, let no one cause me trouble, for I bear on my body the marks of Jesus. 18 The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit, brothers. Amen.

I had a few thoughts while reading this passage.
1) We are to "restore each other gently."  But, we have to watch ourselves, or we will also be tempted.  Correcting sin is a dangerous business, and not something that can be appraoched lightly, without careful prayer.  If not careful, we'll just end up exactly like the sweaty heathen they are.
2)  There is no break between the other person's sin, and us all carrying each other's burdens.  Are they related?
3)  If we somehow aren't careful, or do not carry one another's burdens, we are deceiving ourselves.
4)We should test our own actions, not everyone else's.  Good stuff there.
5) God will not be mocked.  I don't have to worry about all the sweaty heathens out there.  I have been reconciled to God through His Holy Son, and live in His grace.  Those that live in sin will pay the consequences of it.  That is God's nature, and I don't have to be the executioner of that.
6) I just need to do good.  Then, do good.  Then, do some more good.
7)Those who are faking it, trying to look good on the outside while being a mess inside (ZOMBIES!) will try to get me to be the same way.  I don't have to.  I should just go do some more good.
So  maybe that was more than a few thoughts.  What do you think?  Anything else jump out at you from this passage?  Anything that jumped out at me sound crazy?

Zombocalypse

First, I cannot take credit for "zombocalypse."  Penny came up with that one.  I like it.
Now, onward and upward.
I have a weird relationship with zombies.  As far as monsters go, they aren't my favorites.  I much prefer the (non-Twilight) vampires.  (Are we still really counting those sparkly things as vampires?  Really?  Come on.  Please.)  They are strong and smart and fast and witty and romantic and just more fun.  They seem more human to me, at least until recently.  My personal favorite vamps are from the House of Night Series.  Not quite Bram Stoker, but much MUCH cooler than the twilighters.  This particular story keeps the humanity, good and bad, of the characters as they change.  It focuses on choices made instead of what you are.  Good stuff there.
But, I digress.  I want to talk about zombies.  No, I don't have a zombie contingency plan.  John offered to let me in his group, but only as zombie bait.  I'm not too fond of that one.  So let me know if you have room for one other in your zombie survival group.
I've recently discovered that zombies may be more relatable than vampires.  I had a horrible bout with Strep last year, and felt like death warmed over.  Many of us who went to the same Halloween celebration last night are roming about like zombies today.  I think we really get the idea of being alive, but not actually alive, at least physically.  (Any theatre kids thinking show week here?)  But even more than physically, I think we understand this concept spiritually.
The Old Testament talks about some reanimated bodies.

1 The hand of the LORD was upon me, and he brought me out by the Spirit of the LORD and set me in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones. 2 He led me back and forth among them, and I saw a great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. 3 He asked me, "Son of man, can these bones live?" I said, "O Sovereign LORD, you alone know." 4 Then he said to me, "Prophesy to these bones and say to them, 'Dry bones, hear the word of the LORD! 5 This is what the Sovereign LORD says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. 6 I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the LORD.' " 7 So I prophesied as I was commanded. And as I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone. 8 I looked, and tendons and flesh appeared on them and skin covered them, but there was no breath in them. 9 Then he said to me, "Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, son of man, and say to it, 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says: Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe into these slain, that they may live.' " 10 So I prophesied as he commanded me, and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet--a vast army. 11 Then he said to me: "Son of man, these bones are the whole house of Israel. They say, 'Our bones are dried up and our hope is gone; we are cut off.' 12 Therefore prophesy and say to them: 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says: O my people, I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them; I will bring you back to the land of Israel. 13 Then you, my people, will know that I am the LORD, when I open your graves and bring you up from them. 14 I will put my Spirit in you and you will live, and I will settle you in your own land. Then you will know that I the LORD have spoken, and I have done it, declares the LORD.' "

In this passage we see God take dry, old bones and bring them to life.
Now, I would suggest that this is an early model of salvation.  Which is awesome.  I love seeing the Gospel throughout the Word.  But, what about those of us who were dry bones, were brought to life, and for whatever reason are feeling more like the rotting corpse of what we once were in Christ?  What about us that are feeling like zombies?  We were alive, maybe in a great way.  But we seem to be dying in this new life.  I honestly think that if we looked on the outside like we actually are spiritually, many of us would greatly resemble the walking dead.  Bloody, smelly, pieces falling off or completely missing.  I really like this picture.  I know it's how I feel and see myself sometimes.
As gross as that is, and as harsh as that is, there is hope.  God took a valley of dry bones, and made them alive.  Surely He can take a roughed up life and renew it!  If we were dry bones, but became new in Christ, then there is no reason to think we have to stumble around like zombies when life beats us up.  The one who raised from the dead did so gloriously, and craved no violence or brains afterward.  It's time we stop wandering around like some reanimated version of dry bones, and live in new life.  Check out Philippians 1:

3 I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

He isn't done with the dry bones.  We aren't just the reanimated dead.  We are alive in Christ!
Happy Halloween!

Reason #2 I'd couldn't be a member of a mega-church:
If the Zombie Apocalypse happens during services, how do you get out of that crowd?  I don't run very fast, I don't climb very well, and I'm generally clumsy.  If the Zombies start during church, I have to have an open lane to escape, or I'm done for.  No way I'd survive in a crowd.  Forget that.

How Josh Groban Makes Me A Better Person

This list could get very long.  I really love Josh Groban's music.  As I listen to the pre-releases of songs off of Illuminations, I just fall in love more.  Not only is his voice and instrumental ability phenomenal, the lyrics are so powerful.  And he's cute.  So yeah, I love me some Josh Groban.
But that is not necessarily how he makes me a better person.  Something occurred to me today throughout the course of a few different conversations.  It finally clicked personally for me while listening to Higher Window, so I'm giving Josh some credit.  It should probably mostly (all) go to the Holy Spirit, but that would be too rational for me. :)
Something I have been doing regularly over that past few weeks is listening to the songs available off of Illuminations, and looking up lyrics, and reading reviews and interviews, and stalking Josh's Facebook and website.  And this isn't just when I'm bored.  I am really excited about the new album, so I am going out of my way to know as much as I can, to experience as much as I can and just generally focusing on anything little thing I can find about Josh and Illuminations.  It has become a priority to me, so I do it.
With the youth and in adult Bible study around BHCC, we've spent ALOT of time lately talking about making a conscious choice to have a personal, vibrant relationship with Jesus.  What does that mean?  What does that look like?  How do we actually do that?  It has been some great discussion!  And it always comes back to making the choice to do it.  But what I realized today while cyber-stalking Josh was that it goes beyond liking Jesus or His teachings and choosing to continue to accept that.  It goes beyond even choosing to believe.  After the choice, you have to do something.  How many people like Josh Groban but don't even know that 3 songs have already been released from Illuminations and can be heard free on Soundcloud?
The choice is vital.  It will never start without the choice.  But it doesn't end at the choice.  The choice to persue a vibrant relationship with Jesus is the catalyst that leads to action.  I think that action is the response to His great love and grace.  But that is another blog.  Today, Josh showed me that the choice should always lead to action. 
So, instead of only reading my bible early in the day or when I'm preparing a lesson, instead of only praying at the beginning and end of the day or when I'm more than mildly concerned the high schoolers want to kill the middle schoolers, instead of only seeking God's will when I'm confused, I'm going to do all of that as regularly as I stalk Josh Groban this next week.  The choice to love Him was vital, but I'm betting these actions will bring about more joy in Jesus than that choice ever has!
Thanks Josh Groban.  You continue to rock our worlds.

Loving Severely

Today we are supposed to wear purple in honor of the teens that have committed suicide recently and to show support for GLBT teens.  We are letting them know they are not alone and that they are loved and valued.
I feel like blogging about this is cheating since so many people smarter than me have already written about it.  But, wearing purple is not enough for me. Therefore, I am writing.
The God of the universe loves us severely. I can't think of any other word to put in place of severe.  He didn't just tell us in the covenant with Abraham.  He didn't just chase us through our defiance in the Old Testament.  He didn't even just break us to get our attention in the Old Testament.  Wearing purple to get our attention and show His love would not satisfy Him.  So the Holy God, the Righteous God, looked at us in our most hopeless, worthless, and depressed state, and sat down in the middle of it.  The moment Jesus was born, the divine dove headfirst into all of the good, bad, and ugly of humanity.
I'm not even discussing the cross today.  Because our first taste of hope is knowing that God became human so He could share our experiences, know from first hand experience what life for us was like.  I was lost, lonely, and desperate. He sat down beside me.  He didn't rush immediately to fix me or the problem (that comes at the cross).  He first spent 33 years living, teaching, and experiencing.
I honestly think this kind of love that joins in the life is much stronger, much more real, and very severe.  He didn't want me to be better so He'd have a better Chesna.  He just wanted me, and loved me, and was going to want and love me long before I could ever be "ok."
I can see no other way for us to love each other.  We can not sit on the sidelines of peoples lives and yell cheap cliches in place of sharing our lives.  If we are to love others as God has loved us, we have to live with them, sit down in the middle of where ever they are, and invest in them personally.  We cannot be removed, because God is not removed from us.  We have to love severely.  
So to all of the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered young people that are being abused, to those who are beyond just struggling with depression, to those who can only experience release through pain: we're here.  We are living right along beside you, we will sit with you right were you are, and will share your life.  You are loved severely by people around you, and by a God who pursues you exactly where you are today.  Don't give up.

Devoted is becoming a big, scary word

I have been actively trying to not think about church camp.  My goal is to not dwell on it again until at least December.  So, of course today is the day that I find Student Life Camp 2011 information on my desk.  It was not so much SL's fault.  I have been slowly digging through the pile of stuff that has ended up on my desk, and I was bound to make it back to what was put there in August.  Today was that day. 
When I first saw my nifty little Devoted CD Rom, I decided to put it away.  Then, I put in the computer instead.  Next year's theme is "Devoted."  From what I can tell this is mostly in response to a study by Dr. Christian Smith, Professor of Sociology at Notre Dame.  He is also the director for the National Study of Youth and Religion.  This study began in 2001, and the findings were recently released.  I've scanned most of it, and we'll be discussing it pretty consistently for awhile as I really get into it.
What has me concerned is this idea of helping teens, teaching teens, forcing teens, whatever verb you want to use here teens to be "devoted."  There is obivously no magic solution here, no sure fire equation or perfect plan.  Thus my concern.
But more than that, the elements that seem to be so important to developing devoted teens, no matter the religion or philosophy, are, at best, weak in our society.  How many parents are devoted to anything themselves?  How many other adults are not only devoted, but are actively trying to share that with teens?  How much is the "Christian Culture" (the problems with those two words is a whole other blog serieis) screaming out that this generation is the most godless, the most immoral, the most rebellious?  What have we, as the religious devoted, done to encourage the same in the next generation?  More specifically, where is it that we as the American Christian devoted are failing, as we watch where those outside our faith are being successfull?  Are we that blind, are we missing the point, or does it even have anything to do with us?
I've no answers today, this is just  a process I am starting to work through.  But, I am concerned, and that word, devoted, may come to haunt me in the coming weeks.

Trying this again

I've done the whole blogging thing before.  And I was horrible at it.  Blogging was what I did instead of studying.  And that was the only time I did blog.  No exaggeration there.  So I am somewhat timid about doing this again.  I want to for a couple of reasons.
1) I have a few friends that no longer live near me, and their blogs tell me so much more about what is going on in their lives than a status update.  I can actually see what they are learning, how they are doing, what they are doing and why they are doing it.  I want to share with them the same way.
2) I am learning and exploring and want to share and be shared with.  Isn't that the whole point of blogging?
3) I have a genuine fear that I am losing the ability to write.  I find it harder to spell correctly, I catch myself using shorthand and incomplete sentences when it is not acceptable.  I am forgetting basic rules of grammar simply because I don't use them.  We are changing that today.
4)  Penny keeps saying she is going to start a blog, and I think it is funny I  beat her to it.
There you go.
Now, every good blog I read has a running joke or theme.  I am starting one today.

Reasons I would be a horrible member of a mega-church.
#1-You cannot put theatre lighting in a room and expect me not to want to wander to the light board (and push buttons).  Kick me out from there, and I will try to find a way to sneak onto the cat walk.  You can forget me paying attention during the song service.  The moment those robot lights start flashing, my focus is complete and unbreakable.  I want to watch the lights.  I will watch the lights.  It's been proven, multiple times.  Call me simple, I don't care.  Those things are awesome and entertaining.